The Art of Loving

“To lover somebody is not just a strong feeling – it is a decision, it is a judgment, it is a promise. If love were only a feeling, there would be no basis for the promise to love each other forever. A feeling comes and it may go. How can I judge that it will stat forever, when my act does not involves judgement and decision?”

The Art of Loving, which is written by psychoanalyst Erich Fromm 50 years ago, is still powerful and increasingly relevant to the world today. Fromm broke the traditional Freudian psychoanalysis, got rid of the patriarchal viewpoint, and formed a method based on the belief that women and men existed with each other.

He also emphasized the process of falling in love and that it goes out as fast as it lights up, which completely reflects our deepest sense of loneliness. The act of falling in love is itself objectified, rather than seen as an act that must be fully devoted.

In today's world, we are out of touch with society. Our desire for love increases with consumerism. In this consumerism, we seek to love and purchase objects like commodities. When we are attracted by the product, we will be attracted by the window display. In the same way, we see ourselves as a package certified by society as a socially acceptable product. In return, we look for an equally acceptable partner and find a love that can praise the luxurious lifestyle in unity.

Image Credit: @goodreads

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